Turns out I had no idea. But at least I had the good sense to get my ass to an AA meeting tonight.
Took a couple trains to get there, and four trains to get back; I’m still a bit of a zoo when it comes to Houston’s Metro system. But never have I been so rewarded for knowing my triggers, so as I often text to the befuddlement of my friends: Saul Goode.
(Work it out. You’ll get there.)
I’d never been to this particular place, and crashing in on a cane well after the meeting’s start time certainly wasn’t the best first impression. But within about 16 seconds, I knew I’d made a surprisingly — for me — great decision.
The speaker whose message I briefly interrupted seemed to know I was coming. That happens to me a lot, mostly because AA messages are typically universally applicable to the messes I’ve made. But it still drops me, metaphorically, every time it happens.
“We all here ‘cause we in some pain, ‘cause we caused some pain, or ‘cause we already figured some shit out and just tryna make sure we don’t cause no MORE pain,” my man said. “Don’t matter which of them three reasons got your ass here. You here! YOU HERE, MAN! And for that I applaud y’all. And y’all need to applaud yourselves! ‘Cause by gettin’ your asses to this room, you’ve responded to whatever pain is poppin’ off in your life in the healthiest way possible.
“Y’all said, ‘I need more than me to handle this!’”
It gave me chills then, and it just gave me chills while recounting it for you just now.
And I’m gonna pretty much just leave it right here for you, because whether you’ve struggled with alcohol, drugs, family, ego, whatever … Hell, even if you’ve had a relatively peaceful, pain-free life thus far.
The message really is universal: Life WILL eventually throw you some wicked hooks. But as long as you don’t lunge at ‘em, as long as you don’t try to take ‘em on solo, but rather lean on something or someone that you know is good for you, you’ll be OK.
Two trains, four trains, no trains. You’ll be OK.
Saul Goode!
